Wednesday, April 7, 2004

Put the Pitchfork Down and Back Away, NOW!!

I must be a menace.  See my handy work above.  The pail did nothing to deserve that demise! That is how it went all weekend. The full moon must have been at work doing a job on me.  

All I wanted to do was to clean up the front yard.  To get rid of all the leaves that had accumulated over the winter months and to cut down the errant vines that had crept up the side of the house.  I wanted to pull all the weeds and dandelions that had taken root.  I was doing such a great job and the yard was looking so fine that I became carried away.  I decided to take on too much and stay at it too long.  

First, I found a box of daffodils I had not planted in the fall.  They were beginning to sprout and I felt if I put them in the ground, they may have half a chance.  I got out my trusty pitch fork, which had not seen the light of day since last spring, and happily began to till up the side flower beds.  When I finished the second bed, I tossed the pitch fork behind me without looking.  And when I turned I saw it had landed pretty darn close to the unfurled hose...I let out a sigh of relief that it was straddled over the uncoiled green rubber and quickly removed it. To my horror I saw I  had speared the hose.  Damn!  As I yanked out the pitch fork the inevitable spurt of water gushed out.

I ran into the house to doctor it up before Joe got home.  Duct tape, God's answer to all quick fixes. Unfortunately I had decided to operate right there in the drive way. Guess who pulls up right in the middle of the surgery?  Yup.  And I was feeling so smug. I had not yet thought how I was going to explain the silver bandage.  

After planting the daffodils I was still full of Spring cleaning energy and decided to tackle my car.  It had not had a bath in weeks.  Once I had finished the outside of the car all that was left was to vacuum the inside.  I had the shop vac on the front porch.  I tried to stretch it to the car, but it lacked about seven feet.  No problem!  I would move my car closer to the porch.  

I threw it in reverse and immediately ran over the pail.  "What the hell was that?".  When I got out to investigate, there was nothing I could do but hide it in my car and replace it.  Hopefully  before Joe begins to look for it.   

I got the car vacuumed and it looks beautiful!  I think I could seek work at a detail shop if I had to.  Somehow I managed to yank the hose out of the shop vac body and when I got it back in....well, I'm not sure if it is working properly anymore.  I hid the shop vac in the garage.  I'll just say it was working fine when I last used it.

 A full moon.  Yes, that is what it was.  A full moon working its mojo on me.    

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah been having those days this week. Must be the full moon. Lori http://beta.journals.aol.com/my78novata/LorisLaurels/

Anonymous said...

This entry truly made me LOL....  
:::leaving now and singing:::


"There's a hole in the bucket dear Liza, dear Liza...."

Anonymous said...

A bad day in the yard is better than no day in the yard!! ;)

Anonymous said...

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!    ALPHA!
Vince

Anonymous said...

Yes I do believe the full moon has something to do with it. Sure was a nice bucket. Paula

Anonymous said...

Your story reminded me of an Everybody loves Raymond episode where he accidentally started a fire in the kitchen and couldn't put it out because he bought a hose that was too short, lol.  

That darn moon, such a nuisance sometimes.  =P

Anonymous said...

Wow!   Your enthusiasm was just a little overwhelming, I guess.  My husband couldn't care less about what I wreck in the yard.  He's not the least bit interested in any kind of garden work, so all those lovely tools are mine to break!  LOL  Lisa  :-]

Anonymous said...

So, on your tally sheet, did you accomplish more than you destroyed?  Just a little joke...This is so funny!  I bet your yard looks so pretty!  

Anonymous said...

I love your writing!  I laughed and laughed!  That poor bloody pail!  And you made mash of the shop vac as well!  Naughty girl...I like you! Lily.

Anonymous said...

It had to be the moon!  Too funny.

Anonymous said...

ahhh, man that's a give it up kind of day, just go in and go back to bed and wait for the next one, before someone gets hurt or major damage is done to any structures!! LMAO!!!

~ Karyn
http://beta.journals.aol.com/karynetaylor/WhateverItTakesMyChoices/

Anonymous said...

Did you guys finally run off and get married? The way your hiding things, it sure does sound like you're a wife. ;-) ----Robbie

Anonymous said...

It HAD to be the moon ~ no doubts in my mind.  I had things like that happening too ~ grrrrr.

Smilin Mon