Wednesday, February 16, 2005



Platonic relationships.

Remember the scene in the movie when Harry tells Sally there is no such thing, that the guy is always hoping, and just playing along. How many of us have been there? There is  always that shock when the gauntlet is thrown down. Or suggested that things need to change. I think Harry was  close to being right,  that it is genetically impossible for a man to accept the realities of a platonic friendship! For them,  it is an oxymoron. Yet on the other hand, it is quite possible for a woman to be very happy and content in just this scenario.

I know I was. I have had many such relationships in my spinsterhood...I mean maidenhood. I received my training as a Little Sister. My longest relationship has been with JBS. I met him while living with Cathy, he was a friend of her fiance. JBS lived in Florida and would come up for the Derby every year. I don't think I have ever met anyone I laugh with more than him. When Bridget was four years old we decided to go on a road trip to Somerset, Kentucky. We got lost. We were sitting on the side of the road, in the middle of the night, he looks at me and says, "Another fine mess you have gotten us into." I just cracked up!

Then there is Gregg. He was a childhood friend that I ran into upon returning home in the 1990's. We had numerous adventures over the years including the 1996 UK NCAA Championship happening in downtown Lexington, the 1997 UK NCAA runner-up incident in downtown Lexington, the Frankfort stories, the Kessler stories, the star gazing on the side of US 60 late one night, the Ty goes on forever. He has helped me move several times, he has held my hand several times, and he has let me cry on his shoulder many times.

The roll call is rather long and I think I might be embarrassed to actually list them all!  Each one made a difference in my life. Sometimes when life did not feel worth it, they would bring me out of the doldrums.

The truth of things is this, I have met some very wonderful guys in my life. Why I chose to fall for the moody, angry, dangerous types is the cross I had to carry for a long time.

One night I was entertaining two of my childhood pals, Gregg and Reginald. By entertaining I really mean they just dropped in and hung around watching tv because they had no where else better to be!

Reginald looks at me and says, "If Gregg won't marry you, I will!"

"These are my choices?" I asked in horror!

Gregg was offended and stomped off. "The offer stands" Reginald assured me.

Ain't love grand!


mrccgoody said...

LOL! What a lovely offer...a little unconventional, but lovely.  That's what friendship is all about!

k2plus2 said...

Keep 'em coming Mary. . . You are so inspiring!  Cya, Kris

stephweiss said...

Reminds me of the agreements on tv shows, like the Drew Carey show, where they agree that 'if we're not married by such-and-such a date we will get married to each other, ok?' In truth, it's no worse a reason than some of the stupid other ones we humans come up with. Plus, it has the added bonus of not creating unrealistic expectations about what married life will be. Yes, I like it.

cneinhorn said...

roll call, scmoll call, bring it on! love hearing all these stories :-)  


readmereadyou said...

Platonic only seems to work for me if you remain friends after you break up. Before, they always want to jump your bones. After, the mystery is over. LOL!

ryanagi said...

I had several guy friends...but I always ended up wondering what it would be like to hook up with them, did it once, and then went back to being friends. Curiosity never killed this cat, thank goodness. LOL

njlittlebear said...

I love these entries.


yakima127 said...

I had mostly guy friends all of my life...some confessed to having feelings, some never did.  But my biggest shock was when my BEST friend in high school, (a guy) said, after we jokingly (I thought) talked about how we should just get married, said, "I have been waiting for this for 22 years"...I was PISSED!  He never, ever, eluded to wanting, wishing for, hoping for changed everything.  We don't even talk anymore.  Best friends.  We talked at school every single day, and every single night all the way through high school.  And I never even suspected... Love these stories...JAE

garyvp said...

I'm staying out of this one other than to say I love your stories...keep going.

deabler3 said...

That`s nice!